Movie Making with the Federal Government

You have never experienced the concept of “hurry up and wait” until you’ve been hired by the federal government to write and produce an educational script on parenting.

May 2007, I was brought on board by my friend and director Paul Grant (Tangy’s Song) to write a short script that would be developed into an educational video promoting the concept of “anticipatory parenting within the mother/daughter dynamic.” A mouthful indeed, and according to the feds - an issue that needed to be addressed. The media company overseeing the project wanted a writer that could develop a serviceable script and had experience with the population that was to be the subject of the video. According to Paul, I fit the bill perfectly. I had a masters in social work (with a lot of experience working with girls and their families) and I had just been accepted to a prestigious Los Angeles- based screenwriting fellowship. So basically, a match made in heaven. And to top it all off, the agency that was paying for the project had run several focus groups, made up of the identified population of mothers and daughters, and as a result generated a meaty report that I could use to build a story and cherry-pick dialogue from. Easy as pie, right?

The senior manager and her staff from the media company were crazy cool. They provided clear directions around what needed to show up in the script (five scenarios highlighting problem behaviors and solutions) and then left me the hell alone to write. Over the course of two days I churned out a 14-page script. Afterward, Paul and I met with the senior media manager and her team over coffee and tweaked it. It was then passed off to the agency that commissioned the script and everyone went back to their regular programming.

About a month later I was notified that we would be meeting with the agency to receive notes and feedback. At this point I had been in a couple script note meetings, while working on a short with BET, so I was not overly concerned. That was until I found myself sitting at a large conference table surrounded by folks that didn’t seem too happy with my handy work. Based on the feedback I was getting you would have thought I had turned in the first draft of “Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire.” Paul and I kept looking at each other like WTF? They had issues with the “language”: a character said “hell”. They had issues with the “dialect”: a character dropped a couple “gs.” They had issues with the “violence”: the mother grabbed her daughter by the arm. Finally I couldn’t take it any longer, and with a sweet smile, I asked, “Have you guys read the focus group report?” They nodded yes. Then they knew that the mothers were using harsher language than “hell” and in their world jacking up your kid was as natural as breathing. As I understood it, my job was to show both the inappropriate and appropriate techniques regarding parenting and that focus group report was just bursting with inappropriate. So as far as I was concerned: mission accomplished. But by the end of the two hour meeting, my marching orders were clear: water down my coarse, illiterate and heinously violent opus.

I turned in the revised draft the day before I left for my fellowship (where I would be told I was a frickin’ genius and needed to move to L.A. immediately). Every few months I would check in with Paul regarding the project, but it seemed it was stuck in some sort of special project purgatory. A couple times during 2008, I was asked to rewrite various sections of the script, but basically there was no indication that it would ever make it into production. So eventually I stopped asking about it all together.


Fast-forward two years. I am now living in L.A. and planning a visit to the east coast to see family and friends. The day I land in DC, I get a call from Paul who laughs as he reports that the project has finally gotten the green light and he was entering into a four-day shoot during the exact week I’m home. We both laughed like hyenas and I promised that wild horses couldn’t keep me from coming by his set.

As I drove up on the little blue town house, tucked away in a suburban cul-de- sac, that was to serve as the family home, I suddenly remembered why I like being a screenwriter. No matter how frustrating or exhausting the process, there is no feeling like hearing actors breath life into the words that you had slaved over.

It was really fun spending an afternoon with Paul as he took our little script to the next level. The actors were great and his crew very skilled. Paul runs a very calm and respectful set so there is no drama to report. He did let me know that the original focus group mothers reviewed the “watered down” script and they thought the “inappropriate behaviors” were too weak and they would have done worse. I was vindicated!

I wish I could report that the DVD is now in circulation and being used by parenting groups across the land, but no such luck. The last word is that the rough cut is being “reviewed.” I guess back to purgatory it goes.

Check out my on set interview with Paul.

Jamaica, Farewell: One-Woman Telling Her Story

No one rushes off to the west coast with the dreams of a theatre career. Theatre is the absolute redheaded stepchild in this TV and film town. For those theatre nuts living in L.A., you have to really search out good shows if you are into live performances. So I was very curious when my east coast friend, Suzette, suggested a “must see” show at the Santa Monica Playhouse.

"Jamaica, Farewell" is a one-woman play based on Debra Ehrhardt’s true story of life in Jamaica and her unorthodox journey to America. Ehrhardt, an actor and writer, created the show when she found her acting career stalled and she knew she had a story to tell.

I was immediately fascinated with this memoir -in front of floodlights- because I, too, am from the “blue emerald of the Caribbean,” but was whisked away to America before I outgrew the place like clearly Debra had.

The play opens on a seven-year-old, Yankee Doodle Dandy-loving Debbie at her third grade talent show. She loves everything American and wants everyone to know it. She can’t quite explain her fascination with the country, with malls “as big as Jamaica,” but she knows she must get there.

By the time Debbie graduates from high school, she is hell-bent on securing a visa and making it off the island by hook or by crook. But stuck in a dead-end job and surrounded by a country being consumed by violence and political upheaval, she is not sure how she is going to fulfill her lifelong dream of starting over in the land of "amber waves of grain." Then a chance encounter with a “handsome and well-connected American” puts her hastily thrown together plans in motion and Debbie using every survival instinct to make it through a night she would never forget.

During a high energy and bittersweet 90 minutes, Ehrhardt paraded before us an impressive roster of characters that populates this once-in-a-life adventure. A perpetually drunk father, a pious mother, a ganja smokin’ 90-year-old, and a big butt Brothel owner are just a few of the folks woven effortlessly through a tale of hope, wit, and amazing luck.

Jamaica, Farewell, is energetic and authentically funny. Apart from bring an exceptional storyteller, Ehrhardt’s timing is impeccable and performance fearless. She wrings every ounce of suspense out of her off-the-wall tale and leaves her audience absolutely exhausted (and grateful) by the time she gets on that plane. Her use of her lithe physical form rivals any multi-million-dollar movie special effects and with it she delivers a fine study on perseverance, destiny, and finding where you truly belong.

Jamaica, Farewell enjoyed a successful Off Broadway run and has toured the United States, Canada, Mexico, Bermuda, and the United Kingdom. The show will appear next at the Orlando Repertory Theatre. Ms. Ehrhardt, a member of the Writer’s Guild of America, is currently adapting the show for the big screen.

Ex-UK TV director Francis Megahy directed Jamaica, Farewell. Sound design was provided by composer (and Ehrhardt’s son) Danny Ehrhardt.

Book of Eli: A Review

I haven’t rushed out to see a Denzel Washington movie since “Malcolm X.” And after splashing my way through a rare Southern California rainstorm, I’m feeling like I could have stayed at home!

"Book of Eli" opens on a post-apocalyptic world where a war has torn a hole in the sky and the sun has burned everything and everyone. Those who survived live in a world of scarcity and violence. Our reluctant hero, Eli, has been on a 30-year journey to bring the only surviving copy of the King James Bible to a safe harbor in the “west.”

On the surface a good plot, but the execution is disappointing. Which is too bad because the first five minutes of the film screams potential. The tone, and what is at stake, is immediately apparent, and Denzel does “alone” well. His is more believable and accessible than Will Smith’s glossy, tricked out version in "I Am Legend"

It is quickly established that Eli is resourceful, spiritual, and apparently invincible. His body might be riddled with scars, but he is still standing and walking toward his destiny. He is a man who carries everything he owns in a backpack and has no problem leaving things behind, well, except for his iPod, and of course the holy grail that he has been protecting for three decades.

Because most film-goers have seen at least one post-apocalyptic story the filmmakers could have done more to establish what is so unique about theirs. They touch on some items: you want to stay away from the people with the “shakes” (which doesn't pay off in any real way) and Anita Ward’s “Ring My Bell” is now considered classic listening music (definitely got a giggle from the audience). But for the most part there are no surprises. In fact, there is little that is memorable about this film. In fairness, Washington does a yeoman's job considering the story is so paper-thin. It is basically Eli shuffling, under green-gray skies, through the desert (New Mexico serves as the burned out world) and occasionally cutting off rapist, murderers and sun-goggled bandits random body parts.

Self-sufficient Eli’s mission is momentarily endangered when he walks into a town run by Gary Oldman’s “Carnegie”. Like our protagonist, Carnegie is from a time before the wars. He can read, which makes him powerful, and he also knows where the treasured water source is and of course he is not telling. Carnegie is also on a mission and is using every resource at his disposal to achieve it. I wont be giving away anything by saying he wants the Bible that Eli is carrying.

I’ve enjoyed Oldman’s performances in the past, but here he is just a caricature. I almost expected him to start twirling his “villain” mustache (which he didn’t have). The two female leads, Mila Kunis and Jennifer Beals, are basically props that get manhandled and yelled at for most of the movie. By the end of the film I can’t believe anyone is invested in Kunis’ “Solara” as a character or that she has what it takes to carry on Eli’s mission. There is simply no depth to these characters. No performance pops off the screen and demands that you watch. Many of their motivations appear to be internal and critical decisions (Beals sending her only daughter off with the machete wielding Eli) are made off screen, robbing the audience of the opportunity to care about anyone.

The Hughes Brothers,Albert and Allen, (Menace to Society, Dead Presidents) helm this picture. In what appears an attempt to take our attention away from the weak plot, they invest most of their energies into staging bloody fight scenes, massive explosions, and intricate camera work. Unfortunately, there is not enough in their bag of tricks to get our hearts pumping or save the movie from a less than impressive ending. The reveal is one that comes with little fanfare and left me feeling indifferent regarding the survival of mankind.

Others who have seen this film say that it left them thinking about how power and religion would play out in a society forced to start over. I think the people who were able to grasp that from this film were already inclined to see the connection. I offer that the filmmakers depended on a good number of their audience members already holding the belief that a bible could be the bedrock in restarting a society, and did none of the heavy lifting required in weaving a compelling tale.

Book of Eli was written by first-time screenwriter Gary Whitta (former PC Gamer editor) and produced by Washington. The film is rated R.

The Soulmate Secret: A Book Review

If you think the concept of having a soulmate is crap or that “attracting” the perfect person into your life is double crap, then you should probably stop reading here. But if you have been romantically attached to a long list of losers or every weekend you find yourself reluctantly sitting on your couch with only the company of a bag of Doritos — then read on.

Arielle Ford’s The Soulmate Secret: Manifest the Love of Your Life with the Law of Attraction just might be the antidote to your partner-less life that you’ve been looking for.

I bumped into this little book of love and joy while searching the new arrival stacks at my local library. I am personally not in the market for a new mate, but Ford’s sunny and hopeful writing style compelled me to check this little puppy out and I have not been able to put it down.

Let me be clear that The Soulmate Secret isn’t bringing us any late breaking information that we have not heard before. What makes this 207 page quick read so compelling is its accessibility. Ford saves you from chapters of psycho-babble, that normally makes you feel like who would want to date you any way, and jumps right into how to find that special person.

The book takes you through a quick soulmate IQ test: Do you believe there is a soul mate out there for you? Are there past lovers who still have their energetic hooks in you — or are yours in them? Are you psychologically ready to receive your soul mate? These are just a few of the probing questions put to you on page one. If you answer “no” to any of the nine questions, Ford lets you know right off the bat that you and the current state of mind is the barrier that is stopping your soul mate from showing up. If you must know I answered “no” to half the damn questions.

But don’t fear; she has a host of activities and testimonies to get you into relationship shape. In many ways the book ask that you accept full responsibility for all the sub-par mates that have been showing up in your life. When you look back on your failed relationships you knew they were trouble or broke or alcoholics or needy or crazy from the very start, but you let them in anyway. From the start they couldn’t give you what you needed and you certainly could not impact change in their chaotic lives, so you were forced to ride it out until the relationship died some horrible, often messy, death. Then you were back on that couch, with your bag of Doritos, feeling like a failure and wondering why you are so unlucky in love.

To combat these unintentional relationships, Ford suggests that you make an exhaustive list of the attributes you want in a partner. I know it sounds super easy but try it. After you scribble down the first five or six characteristics a lot of folks find themselves struggling to come up with the recommended minimum 25 items. Partly, the exercise is about showing you you are not necessarily connected to what you want in a partner. This disconnect is why you accept anything that shows up. Once you get past the cute, nice, good in bed and not allergic to the cat, you discover there is a lot of things you hate about your new love. And there you are, back on the relationship roller coaster. The author suggests you should commit about 30 minutes to making this list.

Making your soul mate list is just the start to the process that leads you through a lot of purging and reflection in your life. When it comes to your physical space, throw away those sheets that are still around from two relationships ago. They are probably carrying around some bad love juju. Make a vision board of what you want your soul mate to look like and what you would like to do with them and hang it in your bedroom. Set up an altar to remind you that you “purposely” trying to attract your true love. When it comes to you, get your butt into therapy or some form of counseling. Take inventory of your life. There is a reason that you keep attracting the wrong person. Find out why, and then stop doing it.

My favorite part of the book is the couple testimonies sprinkled throughout. Ford says that all the couples highlighted took the steps recommended in the book and found their true love. We got people meeting on planes, in gyms, in snowstorms, at seminars, and in parking lots. One guy reports that he woke up one morning, with a random phone number running through his head, and when he called it it was a woman living 50 miles away that he had never heard of. After he told her how he came to call her, and she did not hang up on him, they met for coffee and have been together ever since. Stop rolling your eyes, especially if you are still sitting on that couch covered in Doritos dust.

If I had any criticism of the book are Ford’s “Feelingizations.” These are meant to be meditation that you can do when you want to connect to the idea of attracting your soul mate. I personally could not get through them, but maybe you will have better luck. There is also a website that provides a guided audio of these feelingizations that could make the meditation a little easier.

All in all, I think this book is perfect for those who are ready to take a real hard look at their romantic life and are serious about getting into an intentional and healthy long-term relationship. Happy manifesting!